Where's it going...

I sit here

listening to my past

visions creep into my eyes

from my subconscious

What I thought would be

has not come to pass

but my visions remind me

Remind me once again

that time goes fast

too fast

When all's said and done

death will have us

Pictures from the past

people I once hated

become wisps

people I was once close to

I no longer recognize

Distanced

distanced from my past

never have I been more myself

never have I been so lost

I am but a witness to my life

I watch as it all passes by

sounds

visions

I can feel what it's like

To be touched

and held

I use to cry over my past

my present 

my future

Now I am numb to it

all

all

it all becomes witness to me

I achieve

and file it away in a drawer

don't except

forget

Witness to my life

who can know what the past thinks?

the present grates on me

but I can't feel it

witness

I lean on the future

and fall as it gives out on me

like so many

ill constructed 

plans

Shake it off

shake it off

SHAKE IT OFF

Feel again God damn it

the drugs

are they to blame?

Control

control

Without control 

I slip

slip into what?

into the unknown

Numbness is familiar

could pain come?

could pleasure?

It's worth the risk